You came into my life, brought the light and secure I’ve
been craving for so long. You saw my weaknesses as my strength and you saw things
I try to hide behind. With your caring and acceptment, you try to pull down the
wall I’ve built for years, or should I say almost my entire life. Your hugs
used to make me feel safe, tell me it’s okay for being weak, it’s okay for
being down. You came into my life, gave me the feelings I never felt before.
Days by days, months by months. Just like the others, you
started to get sick of me. You no longer see my mess as beauty, no longer
comfort me through dark times and insecurities. Secure turns to insecure, safe
turns to danger, you make me asking my worth and you make me feel I’m not good
enough.
The broken “I love you” is hurting me more than anything you
ever did. I’ve never heard the “I love you” quiet this cold. No meanings. No feelings.
And suddenly I realize, everything, indeed, has changed.
We’ve been broken for long enough and pretend that we both
are okay. We keep smiling while we both are crying inside, keep loving while we
both thinking about goodbye. How could beautiful thing turns into destructive
in blink of an eye? How could love turns to hatred? How could comfort turns to
discomfort? They are the questions left unanswered. Because we are too scared
to answer.
We’ve gone too far, out of the track. And I think it’s the right time to stop.
There are chances to go back to where we were and stand in the place we
supposed to. Some are not meant to be together and maybe we too.
