I
just want to sleep. Then why can’t I? I start to get tired of all those things.
Those sleepless night I’ve spent alone just because I can’t stop my mind from
thinking. Thinking of things I shouldn’t have to think.
I
keep thinking about how the way she talked to me in a loud voice, make me
asking what did I do wrong. Or how my mother is yelling at
me almost every day at things which is not my fault. My father that went out with
his mistress but said it was an office stuff. My best friends who never asked
why every time I be quite in class.
Or,
my disabilities to be pretty like other girls. No matter how hard I tried, I
will never be like them all. My disabilities to please everyone, cause
everything I did just never good enough for them. For world. For myself. I keep
thinking about my disabilities to be loved.
And
thinking, what if the world is not the world I think it is? Or what if I am not
the girl they think I am? Or I think I am?
But
these are not about you all. It’s about me. It’s not about those things are too
much than I can take. But it is about I, am too much than I can take.
So
let me just sleep. Please just let me be. Sleep a little bit longer. Or maybe
forever.
